Bogus holidays, things to celebrate, and a little bacon.

I have never been a fan of holidays. Or rather, of bogus holidays. And Valentine's Day is most certainly a bogus holiday in my book. When I was in college and feeling particularly antagonistic, I would write opinion pieces for the school newspaper about the uselessness of some holidays, and how perhaps they'd become too commercial for their own good, and how perhaps we should choose a day where we celebrated everything that was their opposite. Now, this was a conservative religious college, where many, many students really enjoyed Valentine's Day, and they did not really enjoy my opinion pieces. I received one response from a fellow student telling me that my Valentine's Day article made her cry, and others indicated that clearly I'd never had a valentine, since if I had, I would know the "true meaning" of the day and would not have a heart "three sizes too small" (yes, I also wrote similar articles at Christmas).

A dozen-plus years - and probably as many valentines - later, my feelings on Valentine's Day haven't changed. If you need a day to show someone that you care, you probably also need some counseling. If it only occurs to you to make a grand gesture of affection toward your spouse in the middle of February, then your spouse should whack you upside the head. If the person you love doesn't get "big things" like flowers or a night out on the town, or "small things" like you doing the laundry or taking care of the kids one afternoon, all year long, but miraculously does when Hallmark tell you it's time, you should consider yourself lucky that the person you love hasn't stabbed you in the forehead with a fork by now (which I probably would have done, as my patience for calendar-imposed "love" is astonishingly low).

Don't get me wrong. I've enjoyed Valentine's Day for the grand and not-so-grand gestures. For instance, when I was married, this idiotic holiday was one of the few times that I could cajole my husband to take me to one of my favorite restaurants (a culinary experience he did not particularly enjoy). And purely for giggles, one year, we decided to spend less than $10 on each other - and I invested my $10 in chocolate-covered bacon, since my husband loved bacon (possibly more than he loved me!). (As it turns out, chocolate-covered bacon is a little on the chewy side and not all that edible.)

I no longer have the antagonistic energy of my late teens/early 20s that I used to provoke my former classmates, and really, nothing I say is going to stop anyone from buying their partner a card and flowers now. I don't celebrate Valentine's Day, but I don't need to. And just in case anyone else out there feels as though they don't need to either, or they want other things to do or celebrate this month, I've compiled a short list. No need to thank me. And definitely no need to send me chocolate-covered bacon.

1. If you aren't one of the fans who has already pre-ordered the latest Over the Rhine album, "The Long Surrender" is officially released on February 8. This is a lovely collection of songs. There's a great duet with Lucinda Williams. There's a fantastic song called "Rave On." There's a surprising heartache of a song called "Oh Yeah By The Way." And "All My Favorite People" alone is worth the price of the album.
   
2. Exactly 1 week and 1 day after Feb 14, 2011, "Smart Flesh," the new album from The Low Anthem, is released. Definitely cause for celebration.
   
3. Feb 14 also happens to be Ferris Wheel Day. Ferris Wheels are awesome and super-scary - Celebrate the Ferris Wheel!
   
4. Feb 14 is also National Donor Day. This is very important. Take time that day to become an organ donor. Or, donate blood. Join the national registry of marrow donors.
   
5. The entire month of February is Black History Month. Take time to read up on, or teach your kids about people and subjects like Harriet Tubman, Sojourner Truth, Plessy v. Ferguson, Jim Crow, Civil Rights Movement, Rosa Parks (who was born in February), Martin Luther King Jr., and Brown v. Board of Education.
   
6. If you're a fan of Sesame Street, celebrate Elmo! His birthday is February 3. I bet he would love a birthday party.
7. For those of us who love to sleep, February 28 is public sleeping day. That's right - go ahead...sleep at your desk, at the mall, on the subway, at your local library! I know the library staff in Milford, CT loves it when people sleep in their building. It totally makes their day. Take advantage of this little known holiday!
8. If you happen to be in Englewood, NJ on February 18, you can hear Meat Loaf live in concert. And maybe he'll sing some of his classics!
9. And then, just a few days later, you can hop down the road to hear Salt-N-Pepa. What could be better?! Jersey rocks.
10. But maybe you're in Iowa? Well, then you should definitely participate in the Frostbite Olympics. Snow sculpting, ATV ice challenge, Blizzard bake off, music by The Muscle Shirts, and some sort of to-be-announced women-only event at The Perky Parrot... Seriously, who would pass this up?!